At Times, We All Need Some Extra Support!
Couples Therapy is centered on using our emotions to heal the broken attachment bond in couple relationships and the goal is to create new, healthy interactions. Relationship problems occur when partners experience disconnection at key moments, usually when an individual in the relationship needs the other for support.
This disconnect leads to cycles of negative interactions, consisting of attacking and defending, pursuing and withdrawing. These are damaging attempts to “fix” the problem by getting our partner to understand us, hear what we are feeling or to avoid the argument altogether, in an attempt to not make things worse.
Sadly, these attempts just perpetuate the negative cycles and can lead to anger, resentment, criticism, withdrawing, depression, anxiety, affairs, parenting issues and isolation (just to name a few). You and your partner become “stuck” in this negative cycle which results in an unhappy relationship that lacks trust, intimacy healthy connection and growth.
It is not the “big” fights that cause this heartbreaking tear in the relationship, rather it is the unresolved conflicts that occur day-to-day, week after week, when each person does not feel heard, validated or supported.
The goal of couples therapy is to heal the broken bonds between you and your partner. Once this occurs you are better able to identify your own emotions and needs, communicate feelings of disconnect with your partner and talk about what each of you want and need in a way that creates a healthy and secure connection, rather than disconnection.
EMOTIONALLY FOCUSED COUPLES THERAPY IS OVER 70% EFFECTIVE BECAUSE:
IT IS ROOTED IN ATTACHMENT THEORY
FOCUSES ON THE PRESENT, WHAT WE CALL THE HERE AND NOW. MUCH OF OUR HISTORY SHAPES THE WAY WE ARE IN INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS, BUT THE EMOTION DRIVEN INTERACTIONS ARE THE FOCUS OF THERAPY.
IT IS GROWTH-ORIENTED FOR BOTH THE INDIVIDUAL AND COUPLE, BECAUSE IT FOCUSES ON YOUR STRENGTHS AND RECOGNIZES THAT WE HAVE AN INHERENT DRIVE TOWARDS GROWTH AND HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS.
RECOGNIZES THAT YOUR EMOTIONS ARE IMPORTANT, BECAUSE THEY ARE INFORMATION. A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP IS ONE THAT IS FLEXIBLE AND ALLOWS CHANGE BY CREATING ROOM TO IDENTIFY AND EXPRESS ONGOING NEEDS FOR STRONG, ACCESSIBLE, RESPONSIVE EMOTIONAL CONNECTIONS.
All couples who seek out couples therapy will be assessed for suitability.
Those who are currently experiencing abuse, (emotional,verbal, physical) ongoing affairs, untreated addiction and a shared commitment to end the marriage will not benefit from couples therapy, until these issues are no longer present.
We will provide appropriate referrals for clients in the event that they are not suitable for couples therapy at this time.