At Times, We All Need Some Extra Support!
Couples Therapy is centered on using emotions to heal the broken attachment bond in couple relationships. The goal is to create new, healthy interactions. Relationship problems occur when partners experience disconnection at key moments, usually when an individual in the relationship needs the other for support. This disconnect leads to cycles of negative interactions, consisting of attacking and defending, pursuing and withdrawing. These are damaging attempts to “fix” the problem by getting your partner to understand you, hear what you are feeling or to avoid the argument altogether. This is usually an attempt to not make things worse.
Sadly, these attempts just perpetuate the negative cycles and can lead to anger, resentment, criticism, withdrawing, depression, anxiety, affairs, parenting issues and isolation (just to name a few). You and your partner become “stuck” in this negative cycle, which results in an unhappy relationship that lacks trust, intimacy healthy connection and growth.
It is not the “big” fights that cause this heartbreaking tear in the relationship, rather it is the unresolved conflicts that occur day-to-day, week after week, when each person does not feel heard, validated or supported.
The goal of couples therapy is to heal the broken bonds between you and your partner. Once this occurs, you are better able to identify your own emotions and needs, communicate feelings of disconnect with your partner and talk about what each of you want and need in a way that creates a healthy and secure connection, rather than disconnection.